L-Men Days of Future Past

Same old new stuff is happening.

It's 2014, the year of graduation from Optometry school.

I was thinking how a short 11 years ago I was graduating from High School.

11 years ago, C-o-t-t-o-n! WOOD

A decade really is a short amount of time, from back then until now. Shocking however when Amy told me, "ya think how 2 decades from now we'll probably be grandparents." That's when I realized how time flies, life is short, and maybe, just maybe, Old people really aren't that old

until they're 85 (that's really old no matter what - sorry grandpa Geddes)

10 years ago I was playing at this hot show

9 years ago I was collecting bugs in Honduras

While Amy graduated High School

7 years ago Amy and I were dating other people

6 years ago this cake was eaten

5 years ago this baby opened the mail and announced Houston

4 years ago we had this real estate agent show us this house.

3 years ago we went to Las Vegas to visit these folks

...with that new baby in the stroller

2 Years ago I had collected a Spider and a Turtle

Last year I got some new glasses... and a Jonas

And now we're back to being caught up with today again

bless you Isaac

And now in thinking about the future it'll probably be pretty boring. We move to Louisiana, get a job and a place to live. Here's a picture that Jonas will take in 1 year from now

That's right, Amy will be pregnant with a baby girl and we'll have joined the cast of Duck Dynasty.

And later in October of 2015...

A couple last fun pictures:

We'll be living here: This satellite image shows the trailer home (southernmost structure in the middle) and that huge green square is our backyard!

Every single Larson-sided grandchild and as far as we know nobody's pregnant right now.

Front row - Left is Liam, then Jonas, Luke, and Isaac with Stella then Clarissa in the back row.

I told them 3 times, please line up for a photo, but they just don't listen.

And here's my Gandalf Graduation robes.

Things are great, things are looking up.

Announcing Louisiana

Dear everybody in the world.
My wife and I are announcing that we've chosen to begin our career and raise our family in Shreveport Louisiana!!!

We were led to Shreveport due to a number of what we are certain were inspired events.  

But why Louisiana? I will explain.

There. Done explaining.

Ok Ok, so for the rest of you who are not Cajun food lovers of Crawfish, I'll offer 10 more reasons we chose Shreveport Louisiana.

10. It's beautiful

9. The climate. Average snowy days per year = .8  (ancient chinese proverb: "happy wife = happy life.")

8. Cost of Living is 15% lower that the average city in the USA while the optometry salary offered to us is 50% higher than the average optometrist in the USA. This means

It means that we'll have the means to raise our family. And have enough left over to be able to serve in health focused humanitarian projects.

7. Karl Malone

He's from Northern Louisiana and played college ball at LA Tech whose campus is 1 hour east of Shreveport. Also did you forget that "The Utah Jazz" orgininally was called "The New Orleans Jazz."

6. Crime is low. As in non-existent in the place we plan on living. For example, there was 1 robbery in 2001. No rapes, no murders, and all the smaller crimes are actually decreasing over the past few years.

5. Country. With the land being relatively cheap and open forests, fields and trails bordering your backyard there's no limit to what you can do outdoors. 

4. Empty house.  When you combine low crime, good weather, and wide open country you get a place to let a house full of boys to roam free, exercise, explore, and get their wiggles out, granting mom some sanity in the home. We understand that our children all are genetically exposed to nintendo syndrome (from brad's genes) and intense tendencies to watch movies all day (from Amy's genes.) We feel we must prepare a home to counteract the symptoms of these diseases.

3. The South

You may have heard rumors. Southern hospitality really does exist. 

Folks in the south are simply more friendly. They will get in your business and they will share with you their own business. It's the most religious place I've ever been and that definitely includes Utah. The Mormons in Salt Lake City have a lot to learn on how to take religion public and share the word of Jesus with anyone who just happens to sit down beside ya. It's a culture that is not going to last very much longer in the United States but so long as it does I want my boys to experience it. Also, remember to always respond properly to "how d'ya do?" the next time B'rer rabbit goes hopping by.

2. We've asked God where we should live and He has pushed us and pushed us towards Louisiana over the past year. In our hearts we feel so warmly towards Shreveport and every other place just feels wrong.  Although we think we know best and we try and make lists of reasons why we should live in Texas, Louisiana, or Utah, the TRUTH is that only God really knows which location will be most beneficial to our family. Only He sees the big picture and knows what will be best for everyone.  The 2nd Coming of our Savior is approaching and I plan on a future full of change, war, and destruction. We can't predict where safety lies and so we must trust in the Lord and immediately follow His Counsels wherever he leads us.

1. We've received a mission call!

Amy and I have both received a mission call in the mail from church headquarters. The prophet has invited us to serve as proselyting missionaries in the Jackson, Mississippi mission. This includes Shreveport, Louisiana.

I wanted to put it that way so that all of my Utah family members could understand. We send out our sons and daughters into the mission field without questioning why England? Why Honduras? Why Canada? We just do it because we know that those places NEED MISSIONARIES! Think about it, we sacrifice 18 mo to 2 years of our children's lives for the benefit of people we don't know who live far away. And then after the assignment is complete we get our kids back and quickly forget about the entire purpose why they left. Why do we forget about those people in need of the Gospel? Why do we forget how badly the world needs missionaries? Although there is much work to do among the saints in Utah there is far greater work to be done outside of church headquarters. For many generations the general membership of the saints in Utah have been growing and enjoying building families in one place. But change is coming. Worldwide change is coming and the Lord is preparing for his second coming. Amy and I are among many others who have felt this call to depart from the usual life plan which our parents and grandparents have enjoyed.  There is an urgency to follow God and depart which hasn't been felt in our family for a couple hundred years. Our pioneer ancestors however are with us, and they understand us. They left Scotland, England, Sweeden and Denmark to follow the Lord. Their families did not want them to take the grandbabies away either.

The Book of Mormon was brought back for our day and it starts out with a story of a family packing up and leaving their hometown to follow the Lord to a new land.

The House of Israel is being gathered, not to one nation nor one land anymore but throughout the world and there are many pockets of the world in need of hunters and fishermen to find those who are lost. Shreveport, LA is one of the farthest cities in the US from an operating temple. Amy and I plan on getting a temple built nearby in the next 10 years. 

If you haven't felt it, then let me say it. We Are Excited! This is the same excitement that comes from your 19 year old child when he opens that mission call and receives a formal invitation to serve. No we haven't really received a letter in the mail, but our calling is just as certain and just as divine.

And remember airplanes.  Both Delta and United airlines fly directly to Shreveport, LA anytime for about $320.00 bucks round-trip.

So no tiring driving trips to Dallas or Austin through NYC or Long Beach. It's fast and direct and cheap. No rental car needed either. And if things go as planned we'll have a nice mobile home available for any visitors. Y'all are welcome anytime for some nice warm southern comfort food with the family.

Family, and friends, we LOVE you and wish you all the best in deciding with the Lord where your own future lies. He's always there to guide us and our purpose on Earth is to choose to follow Him or fall by the wayside.

January 2014

Update...

Brad is done with 1 week of school. He reports spending 30% more time away from the family but learning 60% less. He is happy it will only last 13 more weeks.

Amy is super mommy. Handing 3 kids all alone. Plus she's setting up the apartment and establishing a comfortable and functioning living condition as well as handling all finances and everything else. All without WiFi mind you.

Isaac is having a hard time adjusting to ANOTHER new place to live. He doesn't like bathroom fans, (too loud and scary). He is smarter and even more amazing but he also can't help pushing Luke's buttons.

Luke is evolving like crazy. He not only follows and copies Isaac but he is being more and more successful and forming his own opinions and conversations. He is really most impressive when he starts to talk your ear off. He face planted into the TV stand and has a scarred and bruised face. He likes to see Isaac get in trouble and he just may over react to bullying just to get Isaac into more trouble.

Jonas has learned to cry and scream.  However in the middle of the day, if he's very very well rested and fed then he turns back into the perfect angel baby who just wants to gurgle and smile at you for hours and hours. He regularly sits in his bumbo chair, bouncer, and high chair.

Amy was called as the 2nd counselor in the Primary presidency.
Brad was called as Youth Sunday School teacher.
We both give talks next month in Sacrament meeting.

Brad's (my) lesson for next week is about how to recognize Heavenly Father's hand in your life.

So what's the difference between the spiritual gift of discernment of spirits and being quick to observe?

Which is the greatest attribute?

Answer.
Mormon was "quick to observe" as a child. Observe both means obedience and the ability to see.
This attribute enables Mormon to compile the Book of Mormon. Amazing.
With this gift he was able to quickly identify and calculate all of the things that the Lord was accomplishing in the world around him. He saw the Lord's hand in all things and drew connections. He was able to easily discover grand conclusions into the attributes of God and he learned how our God works with his children on earth. The definition involving obedience an vision are not two definitions but one. One with this gift is rewarded by his knowledge to gain a greater testimony of the greatness of God. This will make them QUICK to obedience to God's commandment and anytime you become more like God you come close to Him and therefore appreciate his view.  If I am outside and God is inside then literally coming unto Him will allow me the view inside the house.  Being gifted to observe means then that you see as God sees and therefore you see all that God has done in your life, the lives of others, and all throughout the creation of all the world around you.

The gift of discerning spirits is not just the ability to discern what is good and what is bad. It includes what is a good spirit and what is a bad spirit. This is a good talent to have because we are truly surrounded by spirits all the time. However, this is not the greatness of the gift. In a much deeper use of the gift of discernment of spirit you gain the potential to discern the evil intentions and designs of the spirits of the living. You will be able to see the intentions of the spirit of those who are around you. This will enable you to not be fooled or deceived by them.  You will also be quick to identify the evil intentions in your own spirit by which many are deceived. Lying to yourself will not be so easy. But pushing even further into the abilities of this gift is the very tricky subtle ability of spotting the goodness of others. Seeing their hidden talents and goodness can enable you to turn them in a direction in which they themselves can discover these hidden premortal characteristics. And this gift can finally be used to detect the goodness in yourself. You can discover the purpose of your life, and the abilities and talents you exercised in the premortal existence which were meant to aid you in accomplishing your duties here on earth.

And so as the gift of being quick to observe enables one to see all that God is doing on the earth, the gift of discernment enables one to see all of the hidden and subtle things that only God knows about his children.
The gift of discernment is greater.

We should all first strive to gain this first gift of being able to observe. And after that, if inspired we might ask for the gift of discernment and if granted we might begin to perform a great and marvelous work in serving the children of men.

Elder Bednar talks about how you have to be chosen if you are to receive the first gift. He calls it the ability to recognize the Lord's "tender mercies."  You cannot be chosen until you have chosen the Lord and your heart is no longer on the things of this world.

What is the latest example of proof that the Lord's hand has influence your life?
Hopefully you don't have to think back more than 1 or 2 days to identify it. Elder Eyering set the example for us by writing down EVERY DAY of his life what evidence he saw that the Lord was blessing his family.

Here's my latest evidence of the Lord's hand.

I participated in a lottery in order to decide which day I would give my Grand Rounds presentation.  It will officially be the grand and final project that will complete my formal education. It is hard and difficult but yet culminates in perfect freedom once the task is complete.
I drew the number 7.
7 weeks after the first Tuesday in February will be my date of presentation.
I looked it up and read, March 25th.  It made me laugh. That is a very ironic date for me personally.

It is the same day that I finally took Amy out on a date. It is the same day that I proposed to her a couple years later. And of course it is the same day that the Ring of Power was destroyed.

I immediately laughed to myself. "Oh man." So Grand Rounds is like the wicked ring of power and when it's over then I'm freed from Sauron the evil Optometry school.

If this seems irreverent to you then you have to realize that God doesn't only exist in church. God knows me and knows that the Lord of the Rings is one of my favorite stories and so if I receive an ironic timely "coincidence" like this then I must properly apply it as a special note that my Heavenly Father is not only mindful of me but that he knows me personally, so well that he knows what will make me laugh. He knows what will catch my attention. I now have a greater testimony that Heavenly father knows his children. He knows their joys, and what makes them laugh. I'm not saying that Heavenly Father told a joke which He thought was funny, but which He knew that I would think to be funny, and He would then be able to observe my joy. And even if this joy is small and brief, only a quick laugh at an ironic coincidence is not too insignificant to God. Therefore if He in all His greatness spends time just to make me laugh then how great must be His love for me?

As you look for signs that God is involved in your life, don't look to Lord of the Ring references. If you like Calvin and Hobbes, or the Cowboys, or Mozart, or Hello Kitty, then be on the look out for anything that you know will strike you and grab your attention.

"Faithfulness, obedience, and humility invite tender mercies into our lives, and it is often the Lord’s timing that enables us to recognize and treasure these important blessings."

T minus 5 months till graduation QUESTIONS

We have recently been asked the same question by three different groups of people...

After graduation where will you go?

STAY IN HOUSTON WITH ME!

PLEASE STAY IN EAST TEXAS FOREVER!!

PLEASE, UTAH, PLEEEEEEEZE!

In 2010 we started school and did not know Texas. We naturally leaned towards Utah as being our final destination.

In 2011 we knew that Texas was amazing and realized that Texas vs. Utah was sitting at 50/50.

In 2012 we continued with the 50/50 opinion until the end of the year when we both were wrestling with the decision and finally came to a peaceful conclusion that Utah would again be our home.

In 2013 we continued feeling that Utah was our future.  However over the summer the cold hard reality hit us with doubts and the end of the year filled us with dreams and visions of a lovely life in East Texas. We felt very strongly a huge change in our hearts and all of our Utah plans were definitely uprooted.

Here's a list of what will lead us to making this decision.

Priority #1 is God.  He knows whats best. We're waiting for the heavens to open and a fortune cookie to fall from the sky with our destiny written on it.

Priority #2 is Isaac/Luke/Jonas.  We need them to be raised in the best place ever.

What's good for boys?

-The great outdoors

-Family

-The non Mormon community (long discussion)

-The Mormon community (long discussion)

-Safe neighborhoods/community/town

-Quality schools

Priority #3 is Amy

She says no to the COLD. so.... summers in UTAH and winters in Hawaii??

Priority #4 is Brad

I say no to the allergies. 

Pollen count

So I think Montana is looking very nice.

In all seriousness we've told folks a simplified story about how Family is in Utah but Money is in Texas. 

Utah has been our home and our family does call us there but here's what's not in Utah:

Financial success

Warmer climate for Amy

and...

I have a strong missionary spirit which I cannot shake and which is getting ahold of Amy a bit too. We are pulled away from Utah for that reason. 

Texas has done an amazing job of convincing us that Home is there for us.

I planned on making resume's and sending them forth and waiting for a job to land.

That's not gonna work. So I'm thinking up a new strategy right now...

Wish us luck in our decision making. We still have 5 months and who knows what could happen. That fortune cookie however would be the best if it came sooner rather than later!

oh C'mon!

Jonas's birth story

My pregnancy with Jonas was a crazy ride. I found out I was pregnant on the last day of January. We had been trying to get pregnant for months, so we were so ecstatic! That also meant that the timing was not up to us. As it turned out, with a pregnancy happening at this time, meant I would have to have 3 different doctors in 3 different cities. Brad' s schooling would take us to a new location with every new semester as he got the training he needed to become a doctor. So, first semester we were in Houston. During this time, we had to get our house on the market to rent, figure out what to do with all of our stuff, then pick up and move to Utah.  I'm not going to lie, it was not easy moving and cleaning, and doing everything with 2 little boys and morning sickness.  Luckily the majority of the work came when my morning sickness was starting to subside. And brad was out of school the last couple of weeks. I still had minimal energy and dizzy spells, but we somehow made it through. As the month of May began we packed up our little Yaris as full as it could possibly be, and drove to Utah.

The summer was spent with Brad working at the VA, and we spent our time having fun with family. I wasn't insured in Utah, so I made minimal visits to the doctor, and got my glucose test done.

The end of August came. I was 33 weeks pregnant. And it was time to drive back to Texas. This time to the small town of Carthage. There are no OBGYNs in Carthage, and the hospital does not deliver babies. This meant I had to choose a surrounding town to deliver in, and find a doctor in these last weeks of pregnancy. My insurance had to be changed as well. It was all quite the process, but I finally got into a doctor by the time I was 36 weeks along. The first thing they did was do an ultra sound. I found out baby was healthy, and doing great, but was breach. My heart sank. I really wanted to have a natural birth, and breach babies don't work into that plan so well. I still had 4 week til my due date, and still had hope though. I then went onto my exam, and found out I was already 3 cm dilated. This didn't surprise me at all. I had been having contractions like crazy, and the same thing has happened in my first two pregnancies. I dilate early, but no labor. I wasn't concerned.

Throughout the next week I had more contractions and could feel birth getting nearer. Knowing the baby was breach was very unsettling though. As I tried to mentally prepare myself for a possible c section, I got more and more anxious. I really really did not want a c section, the thought terrified me. Plus, what if I went into labor with the hospital so far away?  I finally had Brad and one of the elders give me a blessing. The main thing I got from the blessing is that all of my trials would be worth it. It wasn't exactly the comfort I was looking for. I wanted to hear that the baby would turn, and everything would work out how I wanted. But that's not how the Lord always works. Sometimes we need our trials to grow. It was a beautiful blessing, and I think it helped me prepare even more for the fact of probably needing a c section. I didn't want to believe it, but deep down I knew it was going to happen.

The next week I went to my second doctor's appointment. They didn't do an ultra sound, but determined through an external and internal exam that the baby turned! I was told that he was head down! I was so happy. Something inside told me this wasn't true, but I wanted to believe it, and I ignored that little voice. Plus I was dilated to a 4.

I spent the next week believing he was head down. I had my doubts deep down inside, but ignored those doubts. I just wanted to believe that everything would go to my plan, and that I wouldn't need a c section. Through out this week I continued to have crazy contractions, and felt as though labor was just around the corner.

My next appointment I was at 38 weeks. It was a normal appointment, I found out I was almost at a 5, and then the appointment was done. But that doubt of baby being head down was strong that day, so before the doctor left, I brought it up. She had completely forgotten baby had been breach, and decided we better do a more extensive internal check. It was the most painful exam of my life as she reached clear up there. She could feel his fingers, playing with her. She decided she better pull out the ultra sound machine. That confirmed it. He was in fact transverse. In the exam, she found my water bag was bulging, ready to break at any time. Because of this, and his position, she told me to go to the hospital right away. The biggest concern was if my water broke, the umbilical cord could easily come out first, cutting blood and oxygen supply to the baby. It could easily cause brain damage or be fatal.

The hospital was in a town 30-40 miles north of the doctor. Our house was 30 miles east of the office. I didn't want to go to the hospital all by myself with a 2 year old. So I decided I'd go home get brad, pick isaac up from school, finish my hospital bag, then we could all go to the hospital together.

My drive home was full of so many emotions. The strongest being sadness. That c section was coming. I shed a few tears and tried to obey the speed limit as I drove through the country side. I also felt excitement and joy that my baby was coming that day.

When we all got to the hospital, it was confirmed that I was going to be cut open.  We didn't have anybody lined up for sure to watch the boys. I did have a few offers from the ward, but I still barely knew anybody as we had just moved there. Luckily the nurses offered to keep an eye on them. They had a tv and snacks and it worked out perfectly.

They wheeled me into the OR. I got my spinal, all was prepped and ready, and then Brad got to join me. As they proceeded with the c section, I all of a sudden got a shooting pain underneath my right breast. Part of me wondered if I was going to die. But I was told it was normal to feel that. That made me feel better mentally, but it sure didn't feel good.   In the meantime I was also feeling lots of tugging, and pushing and pulling. Then all of a sudden I could see my new son across the room. I could hear his cry. He was beautiful. And then the nausea set in. I couldn't really even enjoy the fact that I had just given birth to a beautiful baby boy because I was puking instead.  If it wasn't for getting a new baby, the experience would have been awful. I couldn't help but compare it to how wonderful I felt after giving birth to my first two. I just had to keep telling myself at least my baby is here healthy and there weren't any complications. After they spent awhile putting me back together again, I was wheeled into the room with my family. I got to hold my baby, and nurse him for the first time. He latched on like a champ, and was perfect in every way. His big brothers adored him. I was truly blessed!

Recovery was harder then I ever imagined. But I survived, and am starting to feel normal again. One month later I get a twinge of pain here and there, and if I push myself too hard, it will ache.  But over all I'm doing great.

Jonas has been such a good baby, and we are so blessed to have him in our family. Any pain I endured was so worth it. Even though I didn't want a c section -From first slice through recovery was awful- I am so grateful that c sections exist, insuring that both baby and I were in minimal danger. Looking back, I can see the Lord's hand in every step of the way. We are so blessed!

Jonas Kendall Larson

On September 26th, 2013 we rushed over to Longview, TX and after a surprise C-section, we were greeted with a brand new baby boy.

Immediately he was a part of our family. He looked exactly like baby Isaac and especially baby Luke.  Amy wasn't feeling very well afterwards and so we didn't pick out a name for him until the next day. We narrowed it down to Asher or Jonas or Levi or Noah.  After a number of circumstances, opinion from little brothers, dreams, and picking a name from a hat we finally named him Jonas Kendall Larson.

He was 7 lbs and 1 oz.

This is Jonas a few days old.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now today is his 1 month birthday and he is nearly 10 lbs!

 

 

 

We let him eat it ALL. Messy boy...

 

He's a beautiful child and we are so lucky to be his family.  We loved having Valerie, Janet, Rhone, and Jessica over to meet him but we can't wait to have everybody else meet him in Utah.

 

 

So we've been living here in Carthage Texas for 9 weeks now and we'll be here for another 6 weeks before the year ends.  We've LOVED it here. We've fallen in love with small town life. 

 

We're about 2 hours away from Duck Dynasty and although we've never seen the show, the culture of it is VERY familiar to this part of the country.

 

 

Someday we'll all die and go to heaven.  Heaven will be like Carthage, TX except all of our family will be living here with us.  Also there will be one mountain nearby, and there will be no allergies and it will snow for 1 month every year.

We are in Carthage because I've got an externship site to learn from out here.  For the first time in my life I feel like I'm finally getting a good deal for the tuition money that I'm paying.  It costs $10,000.00 for this semester so that means my experience here is pretty awesome.  I'm learning something new everyday.  I've been forced to improve on all my weaknesses and I'm finally becoming a competent doctor of optometry. It's wonderful.

Our future now lies ahead of us. Not the distant future, but graduation is now less than 6 months away. 
This weekend I am writing my grand resume. Probably one of the most influential documents I'll ever write in my life.  This I will send out to Utah and its surrounding cities. I will send it to optometrist and ophthalmologist offices whether or not they are hiring.  I'll be fishing for an opportunity.

There are no opportunities advertised in Utah and so I need to find them. 

But there are 2 advertised opportunities here in Texas and they are both tempting my attention.

If you're interested in the possibilities you can google option #1 in Onalaska, Tx and option #2 in Piggot Arkansas.

I'll be frank about the very very basics: In Utah we simply may not get a job. It's not that we will turn down a job in Utah and thus we may choose Texas, it's that we may have no choice.

The average salary an optometrist makes right out of school is 87,000 a year.
This salary is NOT dictated by the profession's ability to earn money, it's not dictated by the value of the optometrist, but it is fully the product of one simple fact: Student loans.

No optometry student can accept any job position will a lower salary due to the tremendous demand of the accumulated student loans from 8 years of college education. (and the demand of taxes)

If I want to take a job in Utah it must offer this much for a salary or else I'd have to live in a parents basement long term.

But we have faith that anything is possible with God. We are sending out our resume's and will follow any leads given to us because being near family is a huge priority.

At the same time Texas would like to demand our attention.  We currently have an opportunity which could offer us much more than 87,000 a year annually.  These offers, will hard work, have a tremendous earning potential of owning a practice which within 5 years may gross 1 million annually.

As far as family goes. I remember one of my favorite cousins was Camber, and although his family lived a thousand miles away, seeing them only a couple times a year was still very special. I enjoyed a great relationship with my cousins despite the distance. It was much better when they moved to Utah, but I know it's possible to know your family that live far away.  I need Isaac, Luke, and Jonas to know their cousins too, and I think that will enough success we'll be able to afford to visit Utah every 4 months at least, plus have room for visitors at least once or twice every year.

My heart is currently split on what we should do.  For the last year I've felt strongly that we should aim for Utah and so it still holds sway in the decisions.

God will help us decide.

I think that the video didn't work...

So.
I'll just post it on FaceBook.

But I wanted to add one more thing.

at 3 weeks old... I took Jonas into the office and examined his eyes. They were PURE BLUE. Absolutely no pigment anteriorly.

today I took him in again to see the progress and I don't know what to see.

Perhaps my eyes were tricking me but I thought I saw a light dusting of pigmented cells throughout the entire iris OU.

So this means that all last week we had a pure hope for Jonas being a blue eyed baby, but now I'm pretty convinced he'll be brown eyed. By next week I'll recheck again and let you all know. Please remind me to tell you.

Family Home Evening Lesson for today.

Let me tell a story. 

In the end of my 3rd year of Optometry school, I was preparing to finish up my academic preparations to begin my official externship clinical training.  I would soon be leaving the school where I had studied and memorized lecture after lecture, book after book.  Three years had been spent on campus, in one single building, and often in the same lecture hall, day after day. In a matter of weeks I would get to finally leave the school's cold dark hallways and barren study rooms and instead be out in the real world! I would soon be working under the supervision of a doctor and gain the experience that would culminate and complete my education.

All that stood between me and this upcoming freedom was one more week of final exams.

I organized my time. Scheduled my every waking minute and dedicated it to a specific class.  The most difficult class of them all was a Pediatric course.  It's exam was Wednesday.  I planned accordingly and at last I considered the last of the final exams which was planned for one day later.  Thursday would be the Low Vision Rehabilitation exam.  After much thought I felt that I could study sufficiently for that exam in the time after the Wednesday exam, and throughout Thursday morning. That's all.

I had felt inspired all semester long to take an interest in this Low Vision class.  I had considered applying for a Low vision residency.  Knowing that such an application would most benefit from a good grade in that course I was sure to pay extra attention to every detail of that class.  I was one of the few students who did not fall asleep during the lectures.  I took wonderful notes.  And because of my preparation, I felt that with a mere 12 hours of time in between exams, I would be able to be ready for any question.

After the terrifying pediatric exam was over, I went to my locker.  To my surprise, my Low Vision folder was missing.  I looked through my backpack, I called my wife and she looked through the house.  I went out and searched my car.  I checked the lost and found.  It was gone.  Surely no student would throw away such valuable notes.  Surely no janitor would toss it in the trash.  And yet it was gone.

I asked my friends for help.  They reminded me that many of the lectures were available online.  I had forgotten this and I thanked them.  While at school however I sat with my friends and began to study alongside them, using their notes.  There is a lot of math involved in Low Vision, and so I pulled out my calculator.

It would not turn on.  The battery was dead!  Now you tell me, how often do batteries die on simple calculators.  I had been carrying around calculators and using them in school for over 15 years now and this was the first time I was ever faced with a dead one. 

That night I drove home in the dark.  I got out to open the garage while carrying a handful of my things.  As I raised open the garage door something fell out of my hands, and I heard a very depressing sound.  A crackle.

I looked down to see my tablet. A device I had purchased one year ago to help me in school. I hesitated as I leaned over to pick it up.  I looked at the screen, and even in the dark I noticed a crack.  My absolute worst fears had just been confirmed.  And according to the horror stories of my friends who had also dropped their tablets, this meant the end. It would no longer work at all because it's functions were controlled by the touch screen. 

I suddenly realized a theme to all of my misfortunes.
My calculator
My lost notes
My lack of time
and now my Tablet, which was supposed to connect me with the online material for the night,
it all was gone. and it was all critical for studying for tomorrow's exam.
I had nothing left which to prepare. 
Inside our home we have a laptop. I would've used that but the power chord had died a few weeks earlier.  We replaced the power chord but that new chord had already broken just a few days earlier.

What was I going to do for this test?

I notified my classmates of my problem and one of them agreed to arrive at school early so that we could study from his notes together.

And so I was faced with the option to be grumpy, frustrated and stressed out.  However it was the eve of my wife's birthday and she didn't deserve a negative husband.  On top of that, both the sacrament meeting talks and the Priesthood lesson from the previous Sunday were about controlling your temper and looking on the bright side of trials.  I myself had participated in class and gave suggestions on how one should stay positive in such situations.

That helped.  Thankfully, I maintained my good attitude.

And then I went to put on my contacts.  Normally they sit in a conditioning fluid that preps them to be comfortable and ready for me to wear.  However somehow this was not the case.  I put on the contacts and began to feel an intense burning sensations in my eyes.  I removed them quickly but the burning did not stop.  I inspected the conditioning solution and it appeared a little cloudy.  The same cloudiness as the sanitizing solution that burns away bacteria and tear films. This was not supposed to ever get in your eyes.

"Great," I thought. "It looks like Heavenly father wants me to also be blind for tomorrow's exam."
Feeling a little flustered and amazed, I tried to go to bed.

As I lay in bed pondering, a scripture came to mind.  A story from the bible which I decided to look up the next day and read before my exam.

http://www.lds.org/scriptures/ot/judg/7?lang=eng

Judges chapter 7:

 1 Then Jerubbaal, who is Gideon, and all the people that were with him, rose up early, and pitched beside the well of Harod: so that the host of the Midianites were on the north side of them, by the hill of Moreh, in the valley.

 2 And the Lord said unto Gideon, The people that are with thee are too many for me to give the Midianites into their hands, lest Israel vaunt themselves against me, saying, Mine own hand hath saved me.

 3 Now therefore go to, proclaim in the ears of the people, saying, Whosoever is ^afearful and afraid, let him return and depart early from ^bmount Gilead. And there returned of the people twenty and two thousand; and there remained ten thousand.

 4 And the Lord said unto Gideon, The people are yet too ^amany; bring them down unto the water, and I will ^btry them for thee there: and it shall be, that of whom I say unto thee, This shall go with thee, the same shall go with thee; and of whomsoever I say unto thee, This shall not go with thee, the same shall not go.

 5 So he brought down the people unto the water: and the Lord said unto Gideon, Every one that lappeth of the water with his tongue, as a dog lappeth, him shalt thou set by himself; likewise every one that boweth down upon his knees to drink.

 6 And the number of them that lapped, putting their hand to their mouth, were three hundred men: but all the rest of the people bowed down upon their knees to drink water.

 7 And the Lord said unto Gideon, By the three hundred men that lapped will I save you, and deliver the Midianites into thine hand: and let all the other people go every man unto his place.

 8 So the people took ^avictuals in their hand, and their trumpets: and he sent all the rest of Israel every man unto his tent, and retained those three hundred men: and the host of Midian was beneath him in the valley.

 9 ¶And it came to pass the same night, that the Lord said unto him, Arise, get thee down unto the host; for I have delivered it into thine hand.

.......

 19 ¶So Gideon, and the hundred men that were with him, came unto the outside of the camp in the beginning of the middle watch; and they had but newly set the watch: and they blew the trumpets, and brake the pitchers that were in their hands.

 20 And the three companies blew the trumpets, and brake the pitchers, and held the lamps in their left hands, and the trumpets in their right hands to blow withal: and they cried, The sword of the Lord, and of Gideon.

 21 And they stood every man in his place round about the camp: and all the host ran, and cried, and fled.

 22 And the three hundred blew the trumpets, and the Lord set every man’s sword against his ^afellow, even throughout all the host: and the host fled to Beth-shittah in Zererath, and to the border of Abel-meholah, unto Tabbath.

 

 

Why me?

Verse 2.

 

I have known for a long time now that the Lord had helped me throughout my education.  I was inspired by Him to pick this occupation.  I was blessed by Him to choose this school and get accepted. And as the semesters have all passed by with exam after exam, I have heard His whispers and felt to answer hundreds of questions in the way He has inspired.  I have required His help much more than many of my fellow classmates because I had 2 children and a pregnant wife to support on top of my usual demands.  I had put God first every Sunday and held off studying anything until Monday morning.  And as every exam score was posted, I would say to myself, "I'm the luckiest person in the world."  I would then remind myself that I did not do this, but it was with the Lord's help that I had passed.  And I could not deny it.

 

Gideon and I both are lucky.  We both also know that all of our success was thanks to the Lord.  And how important will this simple truth be to me throughout the rest of my life?

With every day that I work

With every patient that I see

With every penny that I earn

 

I will remember that it was the Lord who provided. 

And with the same adherence to His commandments and His whisperings which lead me up until this point, must I continue.

I know He will be there with my patient exams as much as He was with my academic exams.

And I will have success. 

But the truth is, the success is the Lord's.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now that I'm done writing this, I'm going to take the Low Vision exam.
Amy just sent me an email wishing me good luck. 
I love good luck, I really love it.